What’s Wrong With Kenyan Men?

Everyone has been talking about why West African men are the number one choice for Kenyan women. But now the question ‘What the hell is wrong with our men?’ has grown boring and it’s time for some answers.

One friend, let’s call her Zuri, told me of an incident that happened to her back home on the streets of Accra that gave me an idea of where we might have lost it on this side of the continent when it comes to our men. In Ghana, men genuinely protect their women.

While Zuri was waiting for a bus or boda boda to jump on, a skunk of a man tried to get all up in her space. He was then dragged aside by other men, beaten to a pulp and reprimanded for being disrespectful to my friend. She did not even know these men.

The men just knew that you protect and respect women – no matter who they are. Because they could be your sister, aunt, mother or grandmother. So why is it that “our men” prefer to insult a woman when she requests the need for more personal space or just doesn’t feel obliged to talk.

I’m beginning to think that most men in this country are emasculated by women. Not that there was a deliberate agenda to do so. Only very few men have blown me away with how polite and gentlemanly they are – by offering to help carry my groceries when I am struggling, or by not shoving me at the entrance of a matatu.

Love me or hate me, I think that however much the feminist movement has lifted women from the dark ages, men seem to be regressing into the dark ages because of it. It has been lopsided. Women are learning to speak up and stand for what they believe in. Men are being asked to scoff it and deal with it. But they are not being shown how to protect and provide for the newly evolved woman.

Maybe as Kenyan women we should lovingly school our Kenyan brothers on how to care for us. And hopefully, they will be willing to learn – we promise to be gentle.

It’s either that or I will have to take off to the West coast of Africa for my cocoa babies.-The Star

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