Insisting on a Woman Who Can Cook and Clean for Marriage is Senseless
Well, I am not about to get applauding from my fellow men today, I just might get on the right side with women. However, it is a reality, in bars and all other meet-up points, when men discuss the women they want, a good cook and home keeper is on top of the list of the good women qualities. There is a good percentage of those women in Kenya, in fact, I think the majority of women in Kenya fit that description (And that is when Synnovate is not sampling data from Nairobi).
The dating phase is a great phase, the woman will come to your place and cook, make sure you are in good shape. She will do a few things that you will find exquisite and on your side, you will take her out for dinner, probably more times than she will cook. You will also as a man try to prove that you can cook and end up making quite a number of meals. This indeed is a beautiful phase of the relationship. You both are too fulfilling for each other and things are working great. In fact, during the dating phase, both parties will spend all their energy to make sure they make each other happy.
Things however change when you move in to the same place or worse, get married. All the hidden sides of both of you start surfacing and you both begin to see the side of things that you do not like in your partner. Well, there will always be that one thing you did not know about your partner but that is not even the point in this piece.
You both showed each other what you are good at, when you move in together, it is time to play that part in the relationship – or not. The man stops cooking forever. He starts expecting to be treated like a Nigerian chief who has 12 wives. The woman finds a way to save funds and build on her career since she is no longer paying rent or any expenditures for the home. Oh and she then employs a house help, who replaces her in the cooking and cleaning roles. She finds more time to spend with her “girlfriends” than spending it at home.
So, my logic – why look for a woman who can cook and clean, when she will never do it for you anyway? Gone are the days when a woman took it passionately to cook for her family and make sure everyone was in good health. A woman who can cook and clean is, I must say, a liability, a wasted resource in today’s setup. She is actually a threat because the moment she ever falls into temptation of liking another man, she will use those skills to gain access to the man. So, I repeat, it is senseless to insist on a woman who can cook and clean when you will settle for her anyway without doing it.