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Saturday, December 21, 2024
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Diaspora marriages-Change needed

A Kenyan couple with 2 kids moves to the west… Life abroad requires both of them to work hard in order to pay bills. The wife quickly adjusts and finds a care giving job and is able to put overtime. Meanwhile her husband’s ego is on the way and is picky with jobs. He finally finds a job in a 40hr/wk job in a department store. Meanwhile the wife realizes if she attends college to acquire a healthcare career, their financial situation will greatly improve. So she decides to enroll in college part time and work full-time. Don’t forget she is still taking care of the 2 kids.

At home –

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They take turns dropping/picking kids to school.She drops the kids in the morning before work and the husband picks them in the evening after work.
After he picks them, he helps with homework and then he is done for the day.
1. He refuses to help with any cleaning, cooking or any house-hold related chores because he considers them a "Woman’s’ responsibility.
2. So the woman rushes home from work, fixes & serves dinner, cleans the house and breakfast dishes before heading to class.
3. After college, she finds dinner dishes pilling in the sink. She cleans the kitchen and loads the dish washer.
4. The husband is watching TV and waiting for her to get home.
5. She helps the kids get to bad before turning to her homework. She is always tired and grouchy.
6. On an average, she gets 4-6hrs sleep while the husband gets 8hrs _ plus a quick nap after work
7. The wife starts to notices that men, especially from the West are helping with house chores and decides to solicit help from her husband.
8. The husband vehemently wants to keep things as they are and refuses to help with house chores including machine washing his own clothes.
9. The wife start to resent him and trouble in the marriage starts. Husband is so angry at his wife for forcing him to perform house chores. He accuses her of wearing the pants.
10. Divorce is imminent.

Surely, the reason the Kenyan man is feeling disfranchised in the West is because he is having a tough time adopting. For Christ sake, why would he expect the wife to put in 40 hours and then come home to take care of him & the kids? Ati he plants his – in the couch watching TV as the wife struggles with dinner and the kids. . Whew. Stop bashing the Kenyan woman in the West. The Kenyan man needs to change!

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Message posted in network 54/Forum by Kneyan

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