The one side of forgiveness that seems to resonate with some people is the one in which those who have offended us ask for forgiveness before considering to grant it. That is Biblical and nothing wrong with it.
There is another side, however, that the Bible talks about. It’s the approach that Jesus not only preached about but also practiced. Stephen, the deacon, did the same. I will let the Bible speak.
“If your brother sins against you go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector.”(Matthew 18:15-17)
Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (Luke 23:34)
“And he(Stephen, the deacon) kneeled down, and cried with a loud voice, Lord; lay not this sin to their charge. And when he had said this, he fell asleep.” (John 6:60)
“Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY,” says the Lord.” BUT IF YOUR ENEMY IS HUNGRY, FEED HIM, AND IF HE IS THIRSTY, GIVE HIM A DRINK; FOR IN SO DOING YOU WILL HEAP BURNING COALS ON HIS HEAD.” Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” (Romans 12:19-21)
“You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.’ “But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.…” (Matthew 5:43-45)
Anger, resentment and a spirit to revenge only goes to destroy one who has been offended. The best approach is to free oneself from animosity and move on.
No one has ever said that forgiveness is all that easy but then that is the best medicine as prescribed by the Lord of the universe. Go try it and you will be free indeed.
Source-pastorbirai.com
